Note: I will accept the truth even
I will accept the truth even if it hurts so much. I will cry if I needed to, just to let things out. Diin sa imo ang gusto mo, treat me as your baby sister, your friend or more than friend? Ky whatever you’re decision I will respect it. But your actions is beyond treating me as your baby sister or friend. Ky feeling ko more than friends. That’s why I’m confused with that. Sometimes I got a doubtful feeling that you might be playing with my feelings that slowly grows within. I don’t know what you want but I know what I wanted and that’s spending more time with you. Maybe our mistake is we do intimate things like hugging and kissing. I allowed you to do that to me because I like you, I like you. No words can explain but I like you. I know you love me and I’m really flattered to hear those words from you and I felt really happy that someone is actually taking care and loving me for real. And it felt so good that I’m praying it would last forever. Actually I could be that someone who will love you and take care of you if you let me, because you deserve to be treated that. I understand if you don’t want committment or any label into our relationship for now. I know you’re scared because things are fast but we could start again. If you will give another chance for us, but this time to let things slow down. We could always see each other to have friendly dates to make things slow. I admit that I really enjoyed listening to your stories, meeting your friends and really I just enjoyed being with you. And I admit since sa tanan nga lalaki ikaw lng gd ang nagpa feel sa akon sng real hug kg kiss, and it feels good that someone is actually taking care of me. I’m not in a hurry since I want to get to know you more. If you need more time to think, I will give that to you. If you need for me to give you space or distance for you to think over what you really want then I will give that to you. Take time to think. I could wait. I went out with you because I know you’re worth it, and honestly you are the only guy I’m seeing now. Moments with you are wonderful, the best days I had. And honestly you deserve my first kiss but I will not give that to you for now baka it will make things more complicated and confused for you. I will only give that to you if ready kna or you know what you want. If you feel you don’t deserve it then it’s ok. Atleast you’ve been honest to me. Wala ta ka gina reject because I know you’re worth it. If you want to stop this just tell me right away para hindi ako ma hurt gid nga grabe. Always remember whatever your choice I will respect it. You only met someone like me once, take the chance to make things right.
Note: Dear Banker,
Dear Banker, It’s been a roller coaster ride for me to meet you. I never expected that you will have a great impact to my life. I admit that I’m starting to like you but I let things go slow since I want to know you even more. I never tried everything that made me experience a wonderful feeling being with someone. I always try to be as good as others for you to love me even more. I had a feeling that you will be different from other guys I met. I knew from the very beginning that you like me. I can sense it. Through your actions, I just knew it. Then I said to myself, I will give this guy a chance. Then I agreed to date you. And I was really happy for the outcome. You were the first guy I dated with. You were the first to hold my hands so tight, to hug me like you never let me go, to kiss me like I’m the only one for you. But I got this doubtful feeling that you might just playing with my feelings that starts to grow within. My heart was melting everytime you touch me, and everytime you say you love me and will take care of me. Also you said that you will never make me cry and break my heart. But I’m also confused about the things between us, if you’re scared I’m scared too. It’s hard to trust someone again. I know things between us is still in confusion. But I will accept even it hurts so much about the truth. If only you could court me properly and love me well, I could love you with no regrets. We could start as being friends for things to slow down, I could do that. I’m afraid that one day when I started to love you that’s the time you will you leave me alone in a rocky road. I understand that you are not yet ready that’s why we will slow it down. If only you knew how much I miss you everyday, thinking that hoping you’re thinking of me too. Missing you hurts so much that the pain still lingers. I don’t know what I’m feeling but everytime I’m with you I get the feeling of butterflies in my stomach. The heart pounding moment when we’re alone, hugging me and kissing me and holding my hand that you will never let go. I just love it the way you treat me like I’m so special. Always remember that you were the first from one of my everything. You made me realized that prince charming exist when I’m with you, even if it’s not real for you, it was real for me. If only you hear how my heart beats because you made it alive again. I never had this feeling for a longest time, it was you who made it work again. Maybe intense pain can lead me to a greater lessons in life. This is the last time I’m asking you this, put my name at the top of your list. This is the last time I’m asking you why, you break my heart in a blink of an eye. And all the times I let you in, just for you to go again, disappear when you come back. And right before your eyes, I’m aching, no part. Nowhere to hide, just you and me. This is the last time I say it’s been you all along. This is the last time, I won’t hurt you anymore. Maybe I was naive, got lost in your eyes. And never really had a chance. My mistake, I didn’t know to be in love. You had to fight to have the upper hand. I had so many dreams about you and me. Happy endings. Now I know. I was a dreamer before you went and let me down, now it’s too late for you and your white horse to come around. Cause I’m not your princess, this ain’t a fairytale who might actually treat me well. This is a big world, that was a small town there in my rear view mirror disappearing now. And it’s too late for you and your white horse to catch me now. But actually it’s not really to late for you to catch me. I will give you another chance, if things will work out between us. Take time to realized that you’re worth it. I admit that you’re the reason why I’m happy these past few weeks. Moments with you are wonderful times, the best day I had in my life. If you just realized what I just realized that we’d be perfect for each other. You were always be my Romeo even I’m not your Juliet. I accept if things will hurt so much, I never been hurt this much. But I will try if it’s the best thing to do and move on. Always remember and be proud that you were the first from one one my everything. Moments with you was something special for me. Very special. You are the luckiest guy ever. If only you knew how many guys I turned down. If we could start all over again and make things right again, I will give us the chance. If not then I will accept even if it’s hurts so much. It’s not too late but I will respect your decisions. I never had an extraordinary moment with a guy before, it was only you I had to experience that intense moment. You will always be my Christian Grey.
The Fault in Our Stars
“I’m in love with you,” he said quietly.
"“But it is the nature of stars to cross, and never was Shakespeare more wrong than when he has Cassius note, ‘The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars / But in ourselves.”
― John Green, The Fault in Our Stars"